La escuela

Yesterday was my first day of school.  It means a lot to me.  Not just because it’s my first day at CSUF.

So, I’d decided less than a month ago that this semester would be spent studying on my own, working and saving money.  It just wasn’t working out.  Really.  I didn’t mind.  And y’all know how much I want to go to school.  Yeah.  Sometimes things are just the way they are.  It’s not hard or sucky or whatever.  It just is.  The wind blows where it wants.  So hippie.  I must stop.

Anyway.  I decided that and to be honest, I felt a certain peace.  It’s not in my hands (thank God).

This past Sunday night, I got sick with mohmsahl.  I have no idea what that means in America.  Can someone fill me in?  But anyway, it came out of nowhere and tag-teamed with indigestion.  Lovely.  A friend wanted to meet up with me that night but there was no way I was leaving the sanctuary of my couch to hang out.  I declined as kindly as my I’m-sick-and-you-are-interrupting-my-recovery voice would allow.

The next day, Monday, the friend called again, wanting to bring over food for my sickness.  By then I was feeling a bit more normal so I allowed said friend to visit my abode with a gift of suhlungtang.  Hahahah jkjk I was super appreciative that said friend was such a homie 4real.  Hahaha.  Anyway.  So this friend comes over and we’re grubbing on our suhlungtangs (so good with extra jeerah, btw).  Then:

Friend: “Aren’t you wondering why I was so adamant in seeing you?”

Me: “Um, I thought it was cause you wanted to see me, yknow, cause I’m awesome and stuff.” as I stuff my face.

F: “Grace, I want to send you to school.  We both know it’s stupid that you can’t do something because of money.  So I’m sending you to school.  I have X-amount in the car.  You shouldn’t feel bad.  And I know you don’t.”

Me: Silence.  Dropped jaw.  More silence.  Jaw remains dropped.  “…. are you forreal?”

F: laughs.

M: stares at food.

And that is how yesterday became my first day of school.  It was supposed to be just another day.  An extension of summer.  Which is not bad either.  But it wasn’t supposed to be my first day of school.  (Technically, first day of school was Monday but I was sick and that’s beside the point.)

Today was my second day of school.  Tomorrow will be my third.

I’m going to take it day by day, semester by semester.  My education, this education is not mine, I realize more and more.  I see how much responsibility God takes into his hands in regards to sending me to class.  I’m surrendered as always, yet again.

Hasta la proxima vez, paz,

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Walking my journey, evolving endlessly into the Me I came to Be.

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