Just

It’s 3:45:30am and progressively progressing.

I’m planning to wake up at 5:40 to go to the rec center and swim.  Maybe I won’t need to wake up.  I don’t know how this will affect my day- I have no idea but right now.  I don’t care.  I’m okay with my day being crappy.  I’m okay with falling asleep.  I don’t know.  I… just.

I just.  I just.

I just.

Jesus, I have nothing to say but I will keep talking.  I’m good at that.

I like you.  I think you are more beautiful than a sunset and you know how much I love those.  I think you are more amazing than the sky with all its crazy clouds and you know how much I love those.  I think you are more constant than the tides of the beach and you know how mesmerized I get looking at them.  I think you are better than life and you know how much I like to breathe this breath.  I… just.  I confess I have fallen in love with you.  I have to.  You have to know.  Because.  I do.  I love you.  I confess that I think only about you and when I’m not thinking about you… I still am.  I confess that I’m blind to everything else.  I confess that I’ve already left everything, I’ve thrown everything, everyone to the side because all I see… is you.  I confess that I just.

I JUST.  I JUST WANT TO HUG YOU.  There.  I said it.  I feel better.  I’m going to bed.

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