Last and beginning

Ironically, I didn’t post on my last day of fasting.  Today is the day after and I feel… the same.  And a world away.  Except my nails are painted and I have a half-finished Sunday crossword lying around in my room somewhere.

So my questions from the first fast entry: What did you learn about yourself?  Will you continue any of the elements of the fast after the 28th?

1. I learned that my heart is in tune with his and nothing is a chore, nothing is dull, nothing is impossible.  Was it possible that everything I did for him began in the depths of my heart, creating a path full of life, hope and joy – even as I abstained from the very things that I found peace and fun doing?  Heck yes.  To the max.

I also learned that I want to study Spanish.  Even more now.

And that I want to be used.  Badly.

2. Hmm.  I think so, but in a more natural way.  I feel somehow a bit distant from the things I gave up, which is given.  I guess especially with school (today was the first day!!!!!!) my heart is very taken by the readings and homework and lectures and alla that good stuff.  I really would like to keep pressing words.  So we’ll see about that.  But even as I write, I have so much stuff to start reading (yay!!!) so we’ll see how that goes.  Definitely less tumblr.  I might delete the account.  All the other stuff – Facebook, nails, shopping – I think I will just have to go day by day and see where my heart stands, how it’s progressed.

So yes.  That is my conclusion.  It was fun and even exciting at times.

I’m happy.  Perhaps I will write more about my first day later.  Not today.  I have to readdd haha.  I love school.  I was seriously happy reading the syllabus and all the things I have to finish by Wednesday haha.

Thanks for reading!

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Walking my journey, evolving endlessly into the Me I came to Be.

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