The amount of resources out there is overwhelming. Exciting, but overwhelming.
So many ways to learn and grow and expand my mind. Where does it stop? Where do my curiosity and hunger become satiated?
So much so that I need to prioritize haha. I’ve signed up for courses, downloaded ebooks, subscribed to blogs, newsletters… There’s so much to do. Too much to do.
All I want to do is improve every day, to allow myself every opportunity to thrive and step into my own. To me, it’s not about the knowing. It’s about the not knowing. After all, it’s the not knowing that causes me to pursue and hunger. It’s the not knowing that leads me to places where I get to know, to experience, to understand what I’m made of, what I want, what I really don’t want haha.
Every day I do my best to do the best by me. In the end, that’s all I have, right? When I look back, I won’t be satisfied by all the good I did for others, unless that was the source of my ultimate joy and fulfillment. I won’t be content looking back on decisions I made out of fear of others, fear of judgment, fear of not fitting in, fear of disappointing. I won’t be fundamentally pleased with myself if I chose anything but my heart’s desire. This sounds extremely selfish until I keep living this out because I’ve seen that generosity is a side effect of abundance and fullness of living a thriving and inspired life.
It’s a pretty amazing thing, to be alive and to have choices. We overlook sometimes, take it for granted. Forget there are people on this planet without that ability. And here we are, squandering the freedom and resources available to us. The shame. The shame of wasted time, wasted talent, wasted energy, wasted breath.
The potential lying in every person is a universe within. To neglect it is to rob the world of all that is within us, the change we want to see.
To seek the better, the more, our superlative, is each day’s mandate. That doesn’t mean ceaseless working and striving. It involves enjoyment and celebration and gratitude and freedom and good vibes. Because we can’t be our best in dire circumstances, slaving away for a nonexistent ideal, what we’re told to chase. Our best is already here – we just need to discover it each day.
I feel like I completely rambled. But here I am, doing my best. I’m trying to write every day. This is my idea of best for me, right now. To produce and keep the flow going. And in that, I revel. I’m extremely pleased with myself. I have no idea what this really means, but I’ve determined writing every day is my self-improvement and betterment. It was a struggle, the first few lines, and here I am. Kudos, Grace. Hahaha.