New normal – 94/100

There are moments in the day when I feel high.

You know those moments?

It feels… like the end of the world couldn’t wipe the grin off my face. And one moment could not be spent in consideration of the thought that I probably look legitimately crazy.

Because there’s joy to be known, people!!!

The moment is now, the moment is here. What we’ve all been waiting for, ironically, is in the very moment of waiting.

If we could realize that we are drowning in the water of life, while refusing to open our mouths to drink it in, quench the thirst…

If we could realize that we are seated at a banquet with our loved ones, with those who are rooting for us, while refusing to fill our bellies and our souls with the abundant nourishment…

If we could realize that we are the master of the house, while knocking on the door desperately longing for an invitation, for belonging…

We are more powerful than we know. Than even what we want to believe about ourselves. It’s scary to think about how much potential we carry, that we are not at the mercy of our environment, that we create our lives.

I believe in God. I believe in a Higher Being. I believe in something much much much greater than us.

But the way I believe has shifted.

God used to be an external Force.

God used to be the Watcher and I used to be the Watched.

God used to be the Creator and I the Created.

God used to be the Potter, I the Clay.

Today, it’s not that God isn’t a Force, Watcher, Creator, or Potter.

God is everything, the Great I Am. That hasn’t changed.

But today, I no longer believe God is separate from me. There is no beginning of God, end of me. No beginning of me, end of God.

There is no difference between God and me, God and you.

When I mix water from the ocean and water from the lake in a jar, it’s hard to say which portion is ocean, which portion is lake. It’s hard to distinguish, identify, point out, label.

They’ve become one material, one liquid, one being. Just One.

The vessel, the jar is the human experience.

And I connect with God in my being. It’s so simple, it’s so easy to overlook.

We would expect that something as grandiose as being close to God would require work, some kind of sacrifice…

And yet, the truth is, we all carry God within. And it requires nothing but faith.

How can we define a point when we started carrying God within us? How can we define the moment of our salvation?

We can’t, because there is no such moment.

But the moment that makes a universe of a difference is the awareness of this truth.

Until we believe we are one with the universe/God, we are not one with the universe/God.

That’s all it takes.

That is faith.

It’s not anything more than that.

It’s a simple decision to let be what is.

It’s so simple, it’s the first thing we let go of.

And we cling to the things we think we can trust. We cling to things. We work for things. We yearn for things. We hope in things.

We do a lot so we can have… things…

When the only thing we have to do to have is to know that we have.

Isn’t that what we’re always being told? By religion, by friends, loved ones, significant others? That we’re enough? But isn’t that the last thing we trust – every. single. time?

Isn’t that the curse of this culture? That we are never enough. That we have to do more, work more, have more, show more. And then we have to do all of that better, faster, richer, stronger, higher.

Tiring.

All of that, even just thinking about it, is tiring.

It’s tired.

The whole thing is a sham. It’s a tiredass sham.

I’m done with it.

I’ve been done with it.

Too much life is passing away before me. I’m not okay with living a normal life, wanting normal things, thinking normal thoughts, feeling normal emotions.

No. There’s a new normal.

It starts here. It starts now.

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