Can’t sleep won’t sleep – 9/100

Time is 2:26am. New day. New blog post.

I woke up around midnight. I knew immediately I would not be going back to sleep for a while. I still tried to fool myself by keeping my eyes closed and breathing long and slow.

I eventually got up to pee. And somewhere along the way, I realized I hadn’t eaten dinner. But I wasn’t hungry. Or maybe I’d gone past the hunger.

After peeing, I slid back into bed asking the gods of rest for mercy.

They turned a deaf ear as my eyes pretended the darkness of my eyelids was welcome. Everything in me was awake. Everything in me is still awake.

I suddenly remembered something I’d been wanting to draw and that was it.

I threw off the covers and popped out of bed.

I pulled a blank sheet of paper from the printer, got my favorite (only) pencil and eraser, and the sketching began.

There’s something so interesting to me about me drawing.

I haven’t drawn in… over 10 years. I don’t know where or why this came up again recently. Beyond elementary school art class, I’ve never taken lessons or been particularly interested in drawing, although I was always amazed and in love with the artistic talent of my friends.

But here I am, trying out something new and familiar at the same time.

There’s something therapeutic about it, going over the same area multiple times but making distinct lines that form a figure, erasing and re-sketching as more insight comes through about what it could or should look like. The concentration that involves all of me, with no one to interrupt is addicting.

I forgot my earlier pleas to the gods, my pitiful attempts at pretending I’m sleepy.

I still don’t think I’ll be able to go to bed but it might be okay. Lol.

Here is what came through tonight.

The hair seemed too hard to draw…

And here is what I drew a couple weeks ago.

I need to take lessons on drawing hair.

I promise I’ll get better. But, Universe, it would be great to get better at a more godly time. Like not 2 in the morning. Just a thought.

Good night/morning.



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One response to “Can’t sleep won’t sleep – 9/100”

  1. stelinfelin Avatar

    Hair looks great. Don’t sweat it! Love this!!!

I wanna know what you think

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