When you go all in on you,
when you trust who you are,
when you believe and know that your desires matter and are meant to come true,
when you live in that knowing,
Life can ONLY BE GOOD.
When you choose to be All That You Truly Are,
Life can ONLY BE WHOLE.
When you decide the life that is living inside you is greater than the life that is perceived outside of you,
Life can ONLY BE TRUE.
Over the years, I’ve come time and time again to crossroads of how I want to live my life,
whether I will trust and plunge into the depths of my soul
live on the surface, feeding off of the scraps of what I had been taught ABOUT life, by people and ideologies that had no idea what it meant to be ME.
Every time, at the fork in the road, I felt like I was going to lose it all if I chose myself.
I felt like I was going to die.
Super dramatic, I know.
But super real, at that moment.
I felt like I was losing a part of me, like losing an arm or an organ.
I felt like I would never recover.
I didn’t know what I would do if my decision was a wrong one.
I didn’t know if I could handle the thought of potentially rejecting a part of me, my family, my culture, my upbringing.
I didn’t know if God would smite me for being arrogant enough to believe what I believed was/is greater than a belief that the greater community seemed to bank on.
I truly felt like the world was coming down and I would be thrashed and flogged for my insolence.
Who did I think I was?!?!?
It never felt easier each time.
Or less heavy.
Or less serious.
But I will say, it got clearer.
The path of and to myself became more and more ingrained in me.
Because at every fork in the road, I chose myself.
I chose what I believed was coming through me.
It had nothing to do with right or wrong,
good or bad,
righteous or evil.
It had to do with the reality of my soul that I was experiencing at that moment, whatever that moment was.
It had to do with ideology or theology or philosophy or religion.
It had everything to do with all of me,
the human experience I was having,
and the divine knowing that was coming through.
Except it surely did not feel ‘divine’.
It surely felt like I was doing anything but being divine.
The tears, the snot, the confusion, the yearning, the fear, the reluctance, the hesitation, the haze…
I felt so lost every time,
so lost that all I felt I could do was go inward,
to seek the truth that resided within me.
Because the answers were certainly not coming from outside of me.
I asked for signs, for clarity, for guidance, for someone to show me.
And every time, silence.
I was left with the option to stay where I knew nothing would change, where things made sense –
but it also did not make sense because I was being called to something more, something deeper, and I knew even if I chose not to go deeper into me, I would always be ‘off’.
And that didn’t make sense to me.
How could I keep living a life where I was barely living, or living on the edges of my known world, KNOWING there was something MORE???
It wasn’t a matter of IF, it was a matter of WHEN.
Because I could only hang on to my known world for so long.
Because, looking back, I can see that I would always choose the unknown.
I can see that I always decided on the road that led to more of me, more of LIFE, more of GOD.
I had reached a place where there was nowhere else to go and I decided to back me up.
Well, there’s always a place to go, even if that place is the same place I’d always been in.
It’s still a choice.
It’s always a choice.
Until it feels like it’s not.
And the calling gets louder and louder.
The outcome of the choice never gets clearer,
but it becomes clearer and clearer that either you trust yourself, you trust your idea of who God is, you trust your place in the world,
you choose a certain kind of death while you still have breath in you.
I never knew the outcome, each time I made that leap, or chose that road.
I never knew how things would turn out, if I would still be standing,
or walking that road,
or rejected by God,
or ruined by Life,
or broken for my arrogance and misconduct.
All I knew was that there was more to life than what I had experienced so far.
And if I was going to be punished for my desire for the More, then so be it.
There was nothing worth living for anyway.
Because all of Life was captive in me, fettered and silenced by my sense of social safety, acceptance, fear of the unknown.
I was the captor of my own thriving, my own breathing, my desires.
When I chose the path that FELT true to me, though all logic was saying NO,
I surrendered to what was already true within me.
Once the decision was made,
once I let go of the old road,
once I chose into me, the life that came bursting forth told me everything I needed to know.
It told me I didn’t need to know anything except that the More I seek is real and true and for me.
It told me I didn’t need to do anything except to open up further and deeper to the Life and Truth within me.
It told me I didn’t need to be anything except all of me.
The fruits of those decisions are displayed in the current reality of my physical, emotional, mental, spiritual health,
in the magnificence of a relationship I have co-created with a soul partner,
in the general thriving of my being, experienced in my love for life, my confidence in my being-ness, my me-ness.
Everything I have decided to go all in on me has yielded a full ass life where all I do is be me and watch the universe respond to me and my ways.
The Life in all of us gets to be lived out.
And it is ALWAYS good.
It will ALWAYS be good,
when you choose yourself,
live into yourself, into your life.
For those who believe this is true and desire to integrate it, I have limited spots available to work directly with me 1:1.
We get you clear on what YOUR soul has to say,
what YOUR path is,
what it means to be fully YOU.
It’s for those who value realness over a pretty painting.
It’s for those who not only want MORE in life, MORE of themselves, MORE FOR themselves
BELIEVE it is theirs for the taking.
We walk you through identifying your truths,
and embodying them,
so you BECOME the person you already are within.
And the rest is cake.
The universe HAS to respond to you, as it ALREADY has been all your life.
You will see for yourself, when you say yes to your soul, life can ONLY be good.
The 6 week immersion with me entails weekly private calls and unlimited chat access to me.
Any additional trainings, processes, journaling prompts, etc. that I create for you during the time is all yours for free forever.
You know if this is for you.
I already know it is.
I wouldn’t wait.