ways you know i’m comfy with you

pc: Soul, who sponsored this beauty of a snack
  1. You will watch me eat with my cheeks bursting
  2. If you ask me questions and generally try to engage me while I’m eating, especially if I just started digging in, I will tell you that I will not answer as I’m attending to more urgent matters
  3. If I’m driving, I will prop my left foot up near the steering wheel. 
  4. If you’re driving, my feet will go up on the dash
  5. If you’re driving and I’m extra comfortable with you, my posture goes to hell and I’ll slump into a ball with my feet up on the dash
  6. If I’m beyond comfortable with you, I will take my socks off and leave toe prints on your windshield. Reserved for Soul. 
  7. If you’re driving, I will stick my head out the window and eliminate any possibility of conversation. Not that I don’t want to talk, but I’d rather hang out with the wind for that moment. 
  8. I will spew judgmental commentary on anything and everything anywhere and everywhere I go. 
  9. Cuss words. Lots of them. All the time.
  10. When you call me, you will be greeted with, “whaddup biiiiiiitch” and other forms of endearment involving ‘inappropriate’ vocabulary
  11. I will send you videos and memes on IG – one of my purest forms of expressing love
  12. I will let myself feel what I feel exactly in the moment and communicate it without editing or filtering
  13. TBD



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