Several nights ago, I had an overwhelming sense of… okay-ness with me. I felt fully IN me, IN my body, IN my mind, IN my soul. When I think back to that moment, the hallmark was that I felt Safe. I felt myself completely at ease, in ways even my normal day-to-day easygoing-ness seemed tense. […]
I’m coming to find that “taking my power back” doesn’t make sense to me anymore because I never actually was *without* it. I simply didn’t realize I had it. And I acted accordingly. That looked like keeping quiet when I had something to say, saying something I didn’t truly mean, doing things I didn’t want […]
Self-doubt is part of the journey. Fear is part of the journey. Some level of anxiety is part of the journey. Attachment is part of the journey. Disconnect is part of the journey. Turbulence is part of the journey. Unrest is part of the journey. Heartbreak is part of the journey. Heartache is part of […]
The scariest thing in the world is a blank page. Looming looming looming leering hovering over me with a presence denser than mine as I search the white space for generosity, mercy, givingness. I keep coming back to it though. A madwoman A crazy Coming back to the same thing, wanting something different, something new, […]
Everyone has their chore they truly enjoy to hate. For some, it’s vacuuming. Others, washing dishes. Still others, sweeping and cleaning the floor. I just mentioned 2 of my least faves. But there’s one that I’ve realized I really really am annoyed at. Folding clothes. Actually two that I’m really annoyed at: putting folded clothes […]
I was in a funk for a few days. Maybe like several days. It was nothing crazy, nothing huge, but still a funk. I wasn’t writing, wasn’t really feeling the flow, etc etc etc. I was sifting things over in my mind, attending to my heart, listening to my soul, and moving through my days […]
The things in our lives flow from who we are. The relationships, the job, the direction of our paths, the experiences, the possessions, the attachments to the possessions, or lack thereof, the enjoyment of life, the inner fulfillment, our physical appearance. All things flow from within us. The energy of what’s within us informs the […]
There is something really beautiful about the flow of life. The ins and outs, ups and downs, side to sides. A dance, a rhythm, a movement, constant, ever evolving, ever expanding, ever deepening. The people we meet, the places we go, the things we do, try, taste, feel… they are all accessories to Life. Our […]
It only matters if you want it to matter. Even the things we don’t want in our lives, they’re there and we notice them because we, somewhere within, want it to matter. They justify us, validate us, and give us a home for our personalities to live in. The trouble with that is, even if […]
Everything is more than okay. It’s more than fine. It’s more than tolerable acceptable feasible doable. Everything is working for you, for your expansion, evolution, growth, uplevelment. Without trying or efforting or planning, all of life is orchestrating perfect moments and situations and experiences so that you can either experience the fullness of who you […]
Soul and I went hiking this past weekend. We did a decent hike to our intended destination, about 3.5 miles from the trailhead (the beginning of the trail). When we got there, we had the option of turning back down or hiking to another peak, with the closest one being a little less than a […]
The spiritual journey is more subtle than many people think. There may be notable spiritual experiences marked by supernatural occurrences, visions, etc. The real journey lies in between, in between those explosive moments, in between the days, in between the breaths. The real journey lies in the quiet still place within, the place that speaks […]
Everything is energy. If you feel stuck in physical life i.e. things are not moving forward in your job or relationship, etc., the good news is, the solution is easier than you think. The bad news is, it’s not visible and tangible. Well, the bad news is only bad news if you choose to continue […]
Ever realize that you are not who you think you are? Or who you said you were? I have. Especially today. I got mad moted by myself and the universe and the MF truth. See, I thought I was super unconditional. Unconditional in the way I am so chill, no matter what. In the way […]
‘You have to have the big picture in mind’ ‘Your vision will lead you’ ‘You will go where you put your attention’ These are all true, for sure… AND sometimes, in the day-to-day, in the melee of life, you get lost and feel lost and don’t know what the HELL you’re doing and WHERE you’re […]
At the end of the day, you have only you. At the end of the day, it will be you and the universe. At the end of the day, you answer to the standard of your heart. It’s only known by you. It guides only you. It may not and will not make sense to […]
In the world I grew up in, and maybe the world you grew up in, there’s been a lot of talk about being overachievers and perfectionists. I’ve never truly aligned with those labels. But at one point in time, I wished to be considered as such, to be someone who was doing big things in […]
I bought two pairs of sweats yesterday. See picture. Soul got them washed and dried this morning so I can prance around in them at the office aka home lol. I was so ecstatic. Don’t ask me why – I love the little things. Within the first 2 minutes of wearing them, I was aware […]
Things are always coming together for you. You are not doing your life alone. You have the company of the universe with you, for you, of you. There is great love for you, right where you are, here and now. There has always been great love for you. You have made the universe smile again […]
You are free to be you. I know, sometimes you feel that’s far from the truth. That there are circumstances and situations where it doesn’t seem possible, acceptable, feasible. I’m saying, even in those moments, when you feel like you’re strained or suppressing yourself, it’s okay to be fully you, the part of you that […]
You are an incredible person. You are an incredible being. You are an incredible soul. I hope you read this and smile inside and out. I have told myself this before and I tell myself this again. And again and again and again and again and again. Because it continues to be true. Now and […]
I’ve not been writing consistently and now, looking at this blank canvas, I feel intimidated. It feels daunting. Like I’m coming home to an unkempt mess of a house, and it’s because I didn’t do the thing I was meant to do every day. I feel, in a way, guilty. And also, not. Because even […]
I feel spent. I feel worthless. I feel lame. I feel dumb. I feel incompetent. I feel stupid. I feel frustrated. I feel stuck. I feel blah. And blah and blah and more blah. I feel what I feel. I stand by it. I know it’s not the whole story. It is what it is. […]
‘The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.’ I both love and hate cliches. Love them because they’re true. Hate them when used tritely. Today though, it spoke to me. I had a moment this morning as I pondered my life and what I was doing with it, feeling slightly like there’s so […]
When processes no longer work, when sermons no longer speak to you, when your world crumbles… it’s the beginning of the rest of it all, the rest of you. It seems there is no meditation that soothes you, no spiritual teaching that holds the key, no tool to get your shit together. It’s just you […]
God never threw me a bone. Every time I asked for a sign, I got none. Every time I asked for a miracle, I got none. Every time I reached the end of my freaking rope, I cried out for help. It freaking sucked. You ever feel like that? Like you’ve done everything you could […]
I had a random journaling sesh that felt really good to me. And I want to share with you. It’s a stream of consciousness, a choosing into the life I know I’m meant to be, into the person I’ve always been meant to be. —————————————- I’m so proud of me. I’ve done so well. Everyone […]
It takes a lot of energy to be a shitty person. I know, it doesn’t always seem like it. Sometimes the shittiness some people spew into the world, towards other people seems to just flowwwww like a mf raging river, so easily, so freely, so naturally. But really, it takes so much energy to be […]
Yesterday, I went out to throw away the trash and there were a few kids hanging out with the two stray cats that hang out in the apartment parking lot. I asked them all their names and at first they were shy, but in no time, they got to telling me about the cats very […]
The 4 habits of ambitious people The 8 qualities of successful people The 25 things to do before 7am if you want to have a perfect productive day The BLAH BLAH BLAH How about the 100 reasons why you’re not supposed to live your life according to bullet points? Let me let you in on […]
I once thought I was lazy, unmotivated, unempowered, incompetent, petulant, too stubborn for my own good, and various other things to explain why I never did what I was supposed to do, what the world told me a successful human being would do and be. I just couldn’t bring myself to do certain things, no […]
Here is what I know. There is a lot I don’t know. And from that place, from my observations and personal learnings, I know this about the country I live in. This is not meant to be political – God knows I would just be obliterated in a political conversation. This is just the observations […]
I sometimes stare at the blank screen in front of me feeling like I have nothing to say. All the while, believing and actually knowing that there is a universe inside of me. Knowing that I am a unique voice of the Divine. Knowing that my gifts are to be shared. Knowing that my presence […]
As a teenager, I used to ponder the idea of something amazing happening, like winning the lottery or meeting the PERFECT boyfriend-material person or having the perfect body or having the funnest most excitingest tight group of friends, and feel depressed. Even back then, in my adolescent angsty years, I felt the dissatisfaction, discontent, whatever-ness […]
I heard it’s National Coming Out Day. For me, it’s less about my sexuality, more about how and who I am as a whole Person and Soul. And part of that comes out as a female in a romantic relationship with a non-binary person. To me, Coming Out is a daily thing, expanding beyond sexuality. […]
Here we are – yesterday’s makeup (just me lol lookit that mascaraaaa bahaha), didn’t brush teeth before bed last night, didn’t shower, didn’t wear pj’s to bed, slept over Soul’s Dad’s place because we (mostly me heehee) didn’t want to do the 20 min trek home and the getting ready for bed routine. I would […]
My partner is not who I expected. My partner is not what I expected. My partner doesn’t look like anything I’d ever imagined I’d ever want. My partner doesn’t act like anything I’d ever expected for myself. My partner is so many things I just couldn’t have guessed. And so ironically, my partner is so […]
I’m sharing my journaling from today. It is my soul flow and if any part of it resonates with you, I invite you to claim it as part of your soul flow. There is no me or mine. It’s all ours. Resonance is an indication of your truth being tickled, awakened, spoken to. Receive it. […]
It is perfectly fine to be where you are today, in this moment. To be fully right where you’re at – is perfectly fine. It’s perfectly perfect. It’s meant to be. Sometimes that level of surrender scares me because I wonder – If I accept *this*, whatever this is in the moment, something I don’t […]
The other day, I had an experience that took me straight back to my teenage years. No detours, no scenic route, no smell-the-roses pathway. Straight back to a part of what I would consider my hellhole-of-a-time teenage years. It was triggered by Soul, my partner, and Stef, my best friend, becoming close. Stef, if you’re […]
It’s really never about the other person, is it? We’d just love to make it so. But if we choose to be absolutely no holds barred real with ourselves, the triggers and frustrations and injustices and pissed-off-ness is not about the others. To the egoic part of us, admitting that it’s not about the other […]
There are no rules to being you. There is only choosing or not choosing to be all of you. Everything else is noise. Rules and conditions work extremely well for machines, logic, and the mind. Not so well for the pure free-flowing spirit and energy within. Not so well for the fun-loving child in all […]
Just the other day, I heard someone say (that rhymes lol), “Humans just like to do bad things to themselves.” Interesting thought, isn’t it? Is that true? I mean, is that REALLY true? Yes, it’s true that humans appear to do things that hurt themselves. Yes, it’s true that humans appear to do bad things […]
I just want you to know today: I didn’t want to write today. Before typing these words, I spent an hour on Instagram, laying on my bed, scrolling through, tapping on almost all the links selling protein powders, and watching Tiktok compilations. Before that, I had taken a nap. I knew I wanted to write […]
Trauma is not required for spirituality. All the ‘bad’ things in our experience don’t justify our reaching for our ‘good’. Life doesn’t have to suck in order for us to ask for better. We can want good just because. We want good BECAUSE that’s what we are. We’re coded to expand and evolve endlessly, spilling […]
Ever been called selfish? Or been afraid to be called selfish? Seen as selfish? Known as selfish? Let me tell you something. I’m about to drop the punchline right at the beginning. On your deathbed or at the pearly gates, you will be held responsible for one thing and one thing only – how you […]
I just had a conversation with one of my favorite people in the world, my partner, Soul (pronouns-they/their). They were sharing with me a new awareness of the idea of SURRENDER. It’s a big idea in the spiritual community. It’s an idea that’s thrown out as advice to people in a hard place, not knowing […]
When you feel like things are not working out for you, when you feel like you’re doing all the things and it’s not getting you where you want to go, or even moving in the direction that you’re intending, when you feel STUCK and steeped in the SUCK, STOP. Stahp. Staaaaahp. Stahp it all. Stop […]
Several years ago, in the early years of my inward journey, my mom told me: if you stop listening to and heeding the Holy Spirit, it/he/she/whatever will stop speaking to you. I am here today to call out that mad bullshit. It is my duty to lay it out once and for all. My self-appointed […]
The beautiful thing about romantic relationships is there is nowhere to hide. Actually, that sounds like the scary thing about relationships lol. Here’s what’s actually beautiful about it. Shit gets real when there’s nowhere to hide. That sounds scary too lol. Basically, the rawness of who you are and where you are at in life […]
The life we live is ours. Somewhere in my past, I learned that my life was not mine. That I was a steward of it, and it really belonged to God. In the sense that she possessed it and had a will and destiny for it. It fueled a sense of sacrificial living. Since I […]
I’ve always done it my way. IT being my life. Maybe in the beginning of any new way of being, process, etc., I’ve sought out and listened. to others. But I consider that the perfunctory, obligatory step, the one that comes before I shrug and go on with the show – my way. I’ve always […]
The indication of a self-actualized person is not accomplishment, awards, money, renown, possessions, connections, power, intelligence, wisdom. All those things are probably present within a self-actualized person. But that’s not an indicator, a hallmark. Transparency, to me – at this time – is the measure of self-actualization. Transparency is, in the words of Dr. Joe […]
You know I love you, right?And that I think you’re badass?And that I think, no, I Know you, in your natural state, are a badass.But sometimes even I forget I am one myself.And so I’m creating a space to drop in and allow the most appropriate and ordained authority – our soul – remind us. […]
Today, I felt like shit. I felt sad, disappointed, lonely, frustrated, angry, annoyed, what else… lame, stuck, blah. A lot of blah. Blah blah blah. All I wanted was to feel not blah. Not any of it. I didn’t really understand why this stuff was coming up. As I lay on my bed, on the […]
I write from my soul. I write from my heart. I write from my soul because I live my soul. I trust my soul. I know my soul. I believe in it. I know it. It hasn’t always been like this. Nope. It’s been quite different. It’s been a life of living outside of me, […]
You are the perfect person to live your life. YOU are the perfect person to live your life. You ARE the perfect person to live your life. You are the PERFECT person to live your life. You are the perfect person to live YOUR life. You are the perfect person to live your LIFE. Alllllll […]
Procrastination is not the issue. Laziness is not the issue. Greed is not the issue. Nor anxiety, overeating, bulimia, depression, worry, fogginess, lack of direction, disinterest, boredom, rage, frustration, mediocrity, loneliness, powerlessness, helplessness, fear, poverty, wastefulness, broken relationships, toxic relationships. None of these are issues. Not the Real issue. They are indicators. That’s all they […]
I don’t get it all. I don’t get most of it. I don’t know much. I haven’t experienced all the things in the world. I’m just me. I’m all me. The thing that is for me is to just be here. To be all me. To be with me. To know me. To see me. […]
When you go all in on you, when you trust who you are, when you believe and know that your desires matter and are meant to come true, when you live in that knowing, Life can ONLY BE GOOD. When you choose to be All That You Truly Are, Life can ONLY BE WHOLE. When […]
There is nothing pretty about living a pretty life. We are not here to live acceptably, decently, understandably, etc. We are here to live life as we are meant to live it. That blueprint exists only inside of every single person. Only in every single person that ever existed, that exists, and that will ever […]
What you desire, desires you. By your desiring it, you create it in your vortex, in the quantum. It begins existing the moment you think of it. We think it’s not “real” because it’s not in physical reality (yet). But the truth is, its “real-ness” is not dependent on it existing in physical reality. It’s […]
Life is happening. Right now. All around you. Especially within you. You are the center of it all. The intersection between the explainable and the inexplicable. The crux of the human and the divine. You. You, the gorgeous awe-inspiring creature, you. Absolutely perfect. Your ways, your journey, your thoughts, your beauty undetectable by the naked […]
You don’t have to know anything except the fact that you do know. That, you do have to know. Because when you do, everything falls into place. And it’s more of a choosing, that you do know. A deciding. A this-is-just-what-it-is-and-that’s-it-ing. An I’m-unavailable-for-it-to-be-any-other-way-ing. Otherwise, you’ll be forever looking at the heavens, beseeching the gods or […]
Until you listen to your soul, you clearly have not done the thing you’re meant to do. You know it. It’s obvious. Obvious is the way you feel BLAH, fuzzy inside, uncentered, desiring but not being fulfilled, unhappy. There’s nothing wrong with any of that. In fact, those are experiences to be GRATEFUL for. They […]
The truth about who you are lies beyond the mirror, beyond your relationships, beyond your experiences, beyond your personality, beyond your desires, beyond your dreams, beyond your ____________. The truth of who you are lies in YOU. It’s such a squishy thing to say, how does one then understand, encounter, know the truth about oneself? […]
Bullshit. I hate this hypocritical sacrificial sabotage. Your path is difficult because you made it difficult. Because you bought into ideas and concepts that were taught to you by well-meaning adults. And now you’ve identified so much with them THAT YOU THINK THEY ARE YOU AND YOU ARE THEM. Your path is difficult because of […]
You are the law of your life. I’m really sorry. By that, I mean I’m really not sorry. At all. But the rules and laws you’ve governed your life around – they’re bullshit. The concepts of expectations, obligations, considerations for others, for the greater good… all of it – bullshit. I’m sorry (I’m not sorry). […]
No need to chase flow. Not being in flow is not the issue, I assure you. The idea that you are not in flow, that is not available to you at any point you desire, that it is arbitrary, that the flow is outside you – alllllllllll bullshit. The release, the breakthrough, that effortless being-ness, […]
I am the center of my universe. You are the center of yours. The construct of the world we experience and perceive exists in us. ONLY in us. There is nothing outside of our perceived perception. And that can be a scary thing, because then… there’s no objective truth. There’s no objective God with an […]
Whatever it is you think you need in order to [ insert whatever it is you want to do and have and be in your life ] is an excuse to not believe it’s available, and thus, not possible for you. Life is responding to you. It’s like little children who hear the bad words […]
Spirituality is not modest. Spirituality is not quiet, submissive, subdued. Spirituality is the wildest thing you will ever experience, encounter, BECOME. I once thought spirituality and religion were expressed by lessening myself, diminishing my desires, relinquishing power over my life, giving everything over to God. Well, that last bit, still stands. But the rest – […]
I am a delight to behold. World, you’re welcome for me. Universe, you’re welcome for me. God, you’re welcome for me. And thank you 😉 Everyone, you’re welcome for me. I understand it is quite an honor to know me, to be in my energy. I get how exhilarating it can be. It just is. […]
Let’s be real. It’s not enough that you ARE Powerful. Eternal Infinite Cosmic Unconditional Creative beyond your wildest imagination Glorious Magnificent Majestic in ALL YOUR BEING. It’s just not enough. Sorry. Not sorry. Really not sorry. It’s quite an amazing thing to BE ALL THESE THINGS. But the THING that TRULY FUCKING BLOWS IT ALL […]
Keeping the peace while compromising yourself is not peace. Believing something for the sake of believing something is not faith. Anything done, said, be’d outside of the integrity of your soul is exactly that – outside the integrity of your soul. And whatever you feel you gain from it is a load of bull. However […]
Humans are interesting beings. Wouldn’t you agree? We can be both alive and not living. Living and not alive. We encompass the spectrum of life, experiences, personalities, which sometimes seems contradictory. My favorite contradiction of being me: Perfect and Being Perfected. Oowee. Arrived and Arriving. I don’t know why I’m capitalizing those words, but here […]
I never knew my life could be this good. So fucking good. But then, I did know. It’s why I followed every single freaking thread, every single nudge within, every single hint and clue and thought and belief that I believed came from soul. It’s why I said yes to what was within again and […]
As an 8 year old, the earliest I can remember, I asked myself: How do I live this life? When I asked that, I was standing on the blacktop outside of my classroom. It was recess. I was facing the big open space for us to run around in, play. I felt no desire to […]
I once met someone involved in an MLM (Multi level marketing). Let’s call her Mary. Someone else had connected us because she found out I was starting a coaching business and she felt Mary would be a helpful resource. This was in the very very infancy stages of my coaching/guiding/whatever business. Grateful for the connection, […]
The thing is, life is not about the story you tell, the things you did, the places you went, the people you met. Yes, they add to the story, yes, they’re fun to talk about, yes, they’re fun to listen about, yes, they are PART of your story. But we didn’t come to this planet, […]
To walk in faith is to walk in love. It’s to walk in trust. It’s to walk in the unknown. It’s to walk in the unknown… knowing. That’s the kicker. Walking in faith is seeing NOTHING that even minutely, to ANY degree resembles the end destination, the life we desire, the person we hope to […]
I am so in love with my life. I am so in love with me. As I type, I see my reflection in the computer screen, as I watch the letters on the screen appear. I once thought the idea of loving self as immoral pride, unspiritual, ungodly. That it meant I was taking away […]
I wish I could tell you I got my body to this point by working out hard or sticking to a diet or counting macros or following a program. I wish I could tell you it was that easy. Because honestly, I’m quite proud of what I see in the mirror. Call me vain, but… […]
I don’t know what to write. But I also do. So, which is it. Well, since I’m writing now, I must know what to write. Interesting. Even as I wrote, I don’t know what to write… I was writing. So, I did know. Which means, even when I don’t know, I do know, even if […]
I have things to say. Things to do. Places to go. I’ve created a life in which I follow my heart and soul, live from within, answer to not much else but God and myself. Many times, I think to myself, I have no idea what I’m doing. But many more times, I feel it […]
You can’t really tell in the photo but I was struggling with my weight and my body. A lot. I didn’t gain a massive amount os weight, but I knew in my heart of hearts, I was deeply dissatisfied with myself. I was skinny in high school, super fit, with a way low body fat […]
Fuck affirmations Fuck the processes Fuck the “it takes time” – okay maybe not all the way lol. We live in a physical world and sometimes there’s some catching up to do that may take what we like to call “time” Fuck the idea that it needs to be hard or challenging Fuck “doing the […]
“From birth I was cast upon you,From my mother’s womb you have been my God.”Psalm 22:10 The moment I read this, I knew this was me. I knew in my heart of hearts, this was exactly what I had been seeking all my life, as a KID. I knew I was not JUST a human […]