What Does Absolute Trust Look Like?

Pulled from my journal this morning. Everything is in caps because that’s exactly how I wrote it lol. Enjoy! I’M RELAXED AND RELAXING ALL THE TIME. I KNOW EVERYTHING IS WORKING OUT FOR ME. I KNOW MY DESIRES ARE WORTHY OF ME AND I AM WORTHY OF MY DESIRES I WALK IN CONFIDENCE KNOWING THAT […]

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The Micro-(r)evolution

I did a Facebook live earlier this morning about how all it takes to get from our HERE reality to our THERE desired reality, is… Faith. Damnit though. Why does it have to be so wispy, so intangible? Faith is for the spiritual, the woo-woo, the devout, the religious. No, you fool. Faith is for […]

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I Am Willing

I am willing to see. I am willing to see things differently. I am willing to align with my Highest Self. I am willing to evolve. I am willing to expand, to encompass new dimensions, to integrate new eternal truths. I am willing to go all in on me. I am willing to believe and […]

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The only version: Me

There is only one version of me. I am the only me that ever was, is, and will be. So, who or what can tell me who or what I am? Who defines what is good or right or best for me? I have lived long enough – I would almost say too long, but […]

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We know God as we are

I’d always been confused by the incongruences and inconsistencies of the Bible. I couldn’t understand why and how the Bible, the source of absolute truth, didn’t make sense in today’s world and time. If it was so timeless and impeccable, how come so much of it doesn’t make sense or fit into today’s narrative? Why […]

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Gratitude and me

Gratitude. I feel gratitude. It feels like fullness. Like the vessel of me, my physical body, the container of my thoughts, the essence of my being is FULL, touching, pushing against the edges of who and what I am. It doesn’t matter what I’m grateful for. There’s a knowing that the logic, the thoughts, the […]

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Onward ho

I told my dad about my relationship with Jolie. 3 months ago. A little over 3 months ago. On the way to the airport, right before I left for a work trip for 10 days. I didn’t plan to make it seem like I was running away after dropping the bomb on him. It just […]

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Effortless union

Life as beautiful as me, Love as beautiful as you. We make a good couple, duo, pair. Hand in hand, step by step, breath by breath. Looking into each other, into the abyss, the bliss of who we are, the perfection, completeness, the completion. Calling forth of the other, rising up within ourselves, meeting in […]

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Just like my Creator

I’m tired of fitting into boxes. Tired of “making things work”. Tired of withdrawing because I’m afraid of losing my space, my time, my energy. Tired of “protecting” my space. Tired of feeling like I need to justify my space and what I want. Tired of “letting go”, learning not to attach myself. I’m tired […]

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Blooming remains

Five years ago, I was out in Barcelona studying abroad and sending photos of my experiences and adventures to my ex. I prefaced my photos with: Sorry, I’m horrible at taking pictures. He immediately responded: You are brilliant and everything you do is fucking fantastic. I blushed at that, so aware of my melting heart, […]

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I told my mom I’m dating a non-male

Me: Mom, I have something to tell you. Mom: What? Silence Me: It’s kind of hard to say. Mom: What? Silence Mom: Just say it. Me: I know… but… Silence Me: I’m dating someone Silence Me: Not a man Mom: ? Me: I’m dating that friend I brought over a couple months ago Silence Mom: […]

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Leaving the nest – Pt. 1

In my life, I consider the moments of moving in faith, “jumping the cliff”. Like quitting my job, letting go of a 4-year crush that I thought would be the relationship of my life (HAHA), things like that. I have no idea what’s at the bottom, if there is a bottom. I have no idea […]

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Are you home?

Looking up at the sky today, I was mesmerized by the wispy clouds against the blue background. Super gorgeous day. I could see the clouds slowly unfurling and meandering, nowhere to go, nothing to do. Gazing at the vastness, enjoying the warmth of the sun, I had a sudden feeling that I was in a […]

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You belong here

My friend, you are the laughter of the universe. The smile of God. You are the giddiness of Mother Earth. Perfect and lovely as you are. My friend, the sun shines brightly, as brightly as it’s made to, to remind you of your warmth, your light, your brightness. The moon watches silently, inviting you to […]

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Still hungry

In this moment of Life, I feel gratitude. I feel joy. I feel fulfillment. I feel flow. And this same moment of Life doesn’t look anything like I thought it would, in order for me to feel gratitude, joy, fulfillment, flow. I work full-time in public accounting, also known as a soul-sucking corporate machine. It […]

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The dead dances

[Taken from today’s journal spew] Wowza. Look at that. “19”. [after writing today’s date] Yeah. It really happened. Really really. Here we are… 2019. Really just a number. Really just a collection of months, weeks, days… And yet it gives us, me meaning. Something to look forward to. Something to enjoy. Or not. The cynical […]

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From the desk of your CEO and Captain,

I would like to thank you for being a courageous player in this Game of Life. I know you didn’t have to, or you could have been less involved or whatever. But you so daringly jump in, yielding relentlessly to faith, truth, freedom. Your desire to live and live fully is magnificent. You are a gorgeous […]

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Reframing disappointment – 62/100

It wasn’t until very recently that I’ve been operating life from a fear of disappointment. That wasn’t very surprising, to be honest. It helped me understand why I didn’t go for things, why I held my breath for the other shoe to drop, why I detached myself from desires, wants, hopes. To be honest, it […]

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Sacred calling – 43/100

Yesterday evening found me sprawled out on my bed feeling not-normal. Feeling bleh, meh, and eh. It wasn’t horrible. Which is intolerable to me at this point. In the past, it was all I knew, this feeling of emptiness, quiet anxiety, lack. Now, I acknowledge and allow, but it is not where I choose to […]

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Source and Me

I am Source. Source lives in me. I live in Source. There is no separation between us. But the “us” negates the separation. How can this be? How can two be One? How can One be two? It’s impossible. And to me, that’s Life. It’s the impossible. The in-between. The inexplicable, uncontainable, untameable. By definition, […]

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Straight shootin

I grew up thinking this is what an apple looks like after it’s fully consumed: Imagine my surprise when I ran into this a couple years ago: I felt like everything I knew was a sham. I know I know, I’m dramatic. I’ve already accepted it. But really, I was sort of appalled that I […]

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